Bits & Bytes

A Mother of Three at Twenty

Recently I met a young woman at a community program. The first time I saw her, she was carrying a baby. Someone introduced her as a single mother. She was of small built and looked more like a school girl than a mother. To my shock, I learnt that she was barely twenty years old, and  she had two other children. The one with her was less than a year old, the other two were aged three and five.

I was curious and wanted to know what happened to her marriage. “Cerai hidup ke cerai mati?” I asked.

Cerai hidup,” she said. [“Divorced.”]

She said that she was regularly beaten black and blue by her husband, who had a violent temper, and it started the very next day of their marriage. She was fourteen when she tied the knot, her ex-husband was eighteen. It lasted six years. It is hard to imagine how difficult her life had been and still is, as she tried to figure out how to move forward with three little kids in tow.

What struck me most was her attitude, the way she carried herself. Despite her predicament, she wasn’t negative in any way. “Memanglah susah,” she acknowledged, in a matter-of-fact way. [“Yes, life is challenging for now.”] But she wasn’t depressed in any way.

It reinforced my belief that God has given each of us the inner resources to succeed, no matter what. Everyone of us has the means to rise, to resolve our problems, and achieve what we wish for, if only we allow our sense of hope and faith in God to prevail. There will be ups and downs, but what goes down can go up, God willing, with the right attitude. It’s a matter of resilience.

Young lady, I salute you. You are one person I can learn from. Thank you.

About Jamilah Samian

Jamilah has written 534 articles.

Jamilah Samian is an author and speaker.

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