QUESTION: Assalaamualaikum. Ramadhan Kareem Sister, I need your advice on how to help my daughter “understand” who is Allah…I am posting below a conversation I had with her yesterday…I am not sure I am doing a good job in helping her!!! I would be grateful if you can help me.
An interesting conversation with Anita (5 years old) while I am trying to finish cooking iftar.
Anita: Mama, what happens when we pray?
Me: Allah gives us what is good for us.
Anita: …and if i am not good can I still pray? (Prior to the conversation I told her she must not fight with Nora (3 years old) as she is fasting –not just food but behaviour and it’s a rule for both of them this Ramadhan- and must be good)
Me: Yes you can still pray (ooops spilt the cut vegetables on floor, picking it up to wash and put in stir fry)
Anita: I am not good always you know….(long pause) can Allah see me?
Me: Yes, He can see and hear all of us. (stir frying vigorously and frying wantons)
Anita: Can He speak to us all the time or only when we pray?
Me: Yes….. at all times …..and also when we pray….
Anita: How can I hear Him?
Me: You have to be very quiet to hear Him.
Anita then closed her ears with her hands was silent for a good 1 minute and reported: I cannot hear Allah…
Me: (getting slowly exasperated with cooking and trying to think how to answer such profound questions): …You have to be very quiet (quite relieved she did not ask what His voice sounds like!!)
Anita: So I can hear Him only if I am quiet…that’s too difficult, I can’t be quiet all the time, I am going to play with Nora now ok you finish the cooking ok….
Me (very relieved): ok madam! phew!
Anita is 5 and Nora is 3. Anita also asked why Allah created us, what He created…I spoke about us being Khalifah etc. she lost interest in a minute or two and ran off to play!! Knowing her she will come around to that question again in another day or two.
ANSWER:
Waalaikumsalaam W.B.T.
Dear sister:
Cultivating a profound love, hope and fear (out of offending Allah) in Allah is the greatest gift you can give to your children. In fact, growing a solid relationship with Allah should be our goal in raising children.
When talking to them, make it simple. Talk in terms they can easily understand, not with big words that might overwhelm them. The concept of God is straightforward, not complex. For instance, point to an object e.g. a chair and say, “Who do you think invented that?” Then move on to explain that everything has a creator, which leads us to other things, seen and unseen.
Belief in Allah is about belief in the Unseen. We can’t see Him, but we can see and experience His creations. Just as the existence of the chair and other objects prove the existence of the creator, so does the existence of objects in this universe (often refered to as signs of Allah) prove the existence of Allah, The One True God.
How do we know Allah listens to us?
We know Allah by his names and attributes. Some of Allah’s names (which double up as His attributes):
- Ar-Rahman – The Compassionate, The Beneficent
- Ar-Raheem – The Merciful
- Al-Malik – The King, The Sovereign Lord
- Al-Quddoos – The Holy
- As-Salaam – The Source of Peace
- As-Samee’ – The All-Hearing – How do we know He hears? Allah The Almighty doesn’t hear like we do. He hears in a way that’s truly fitting to The One True God. If He were to hear in the form that we do, that means He would need ears, and this implies he’s no longer Powerful and Almighty, we all know having human ears means feeling pain, getting ear bugs, not able to hear certain frequencies and such. There are limitations to our sense of hearing! But Being All Powerful means Allah is above all that. Which also implies, it’s unlike anything we can see, feel, touch on Earth. This concept applies to Allah’s other attributes as well. We know this is true because this is what has been taught to us by the Prophet Muhammad S.A.W (more on him and why we trust him below).
On Solah (praying)
This is how we connect with Allah as taught by His messenger. The degree to which we are able to connect with Allah depends on our concentration (khushuk). Think of the meaning of the words when we pray. Explain who Muhammad S.A.W is, the Honest and Trustworthy One, who never uttered a single lie his entire life. Muhammad S.A.W’s character is spotless which proves the authenticity of his message of Islam. Islam is about character (excellent akhlaq) and building an excellent character is the purpose of submitting ourselves to Allah, and all intentions, actions and words in our life, as His vicegerents (Khalifah), so that we are rewarded with Jannah as our Final Destination.
Allah speaks to us through the Quran, which is the word of Allah. To hear Him, read the Quran, which is packed with guidance on how to lead life as successful people, not only in this temporary world (Dunya) but also in the eternal Hereafter (Akhirah). Allah also responds to every single sincere duaa that we make. Here’s an excellent explanation on this matter by brother Nouman Ali Khan, a world-renowned Muslim speaker.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oLkuRIi4SFE
Can we still pray when we are not that good?
Absolutely! As humans, we will continue to make mistakes and Allah loves those who seek His Forgiveness all the time. We pray both when we are good and not good because we want to be friends with the King of Kings, who is none other than Allah Himself. We want Allah to be our bestest best friend.
Recommended Resources
A website I would recommend for good articles:
http://www.suhaibwebb.com/
You may also check out the following speakers via Youtube:
- Nouman Ali Khan
- Mufti Ismail Menk
- Yassir Qadhi
- Khalid Yassin
- Yawar Baig
- Yahya Ibrahim
They are all my family favourites. Hope this helps. Let me know how else I can help you. Wassalaam. ~ Jamilah Samian
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